


Querencia

by Asras_wife



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, M/M, Magic, Memory Alteration, Multi, Nipple Play, Oral Sex, Other, Reality Warping, Sex, unreality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-05
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-10-10 05:21:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20522612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asras_wife/pseuds/Asras_wife
Summary: Querencia- (n.) A place from which one's strength is drawn, where one feels at home; the place where one is their most authentic self.This fic is set in the Oasis, soon after Asra's Route Reversed ending.





	1. I Would Sooner Forget The World

**Author's Note:**

> Gender Neutral Apprentice.   
Asra is AMAB but it doesn't come up until Ch. 2.   
Tw:unreality, memory alteration.

The memories come back in pieces.

I don’t remember everything, but I catch glimpses. The smell of Myrrh. The sound of fluttering wings. An eye patch buried in the sand. Why are those things important? Why do I remember?

“Asra?” I asked, rolling an orange berry between my fingers. “where did you get the idea for this flavor?”

He gives me a sly look. “A magician never reveals his secrets.”

“But…it seems so familiar.” I frown at the berry, searching my memories for the taste. It wasn’t always a berry. It was bigger and…warmer.  
My thoughts are interrupted when Asra sneaks a kiss on the pinched space between my eyebrows. 

“Of course it’s familiar, love. You’ve eaten ten of them already.” 

“I suppose you’re right,” I chuckle. “I’m going to ruin my appetite for dinner.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I’m hit with a shock of realization. When had I last been hungry? Thirsty? Tired? Asra doesn’t notice my epiphany, but Faust slithers up my leg and holds my gaze. Something is wrong, and she knows it, too.

~~~~

I’m lying in bed, Asra snoring softly next to me. After I realized I didn’t need to sleep, I discovered I couldn’t anymore. I lie awake, trying to make sense of the pieces of memories I drag from the depths of my mind. I remember…dancing. I’m me, but…different. Unfinished, somehow. Younger? Asra is there, he’s younger, too. I feel a push; a shoulder to my back, and Asra catches me, inches from his face. Someone pushed me. Who? It’s just me, Asra, and Faust here. That’s how it’s always been. 

I slide off of the bed, careful not to wake my partner. I take my well-worn clay cup from the counter and walk outside to the stream. The sand is pleasantly warm beneath my bare feet. I hear a soft, familiar sound as Faust slithers beside me.  
“You can’t sleep either?” I sit by the stream, dipping my toes in the water.

_“Memories._” I feel her say in my mind as she makes a strange bobbing motion. If snakes had shoulders, I would swear it was a shrug. I lower the clay cup into the water as she wraps herself around my wrist. As I bring it to my lips, the simple cup morphs into an elaborate silver goblet. Instead of cool water, I taste sickly sweet wine with a metallic tang. My throat tenses at the surprise, and my eyes water. I’ve tasted this before. It tastes like helplessness. Like heat and black oil. I cough, trying to clear my lungs of the toxic smoke I feel in them.

_I made a deal._

I throw the goblet as hard as I can across the stream.

_I made a deal with the devil._

The goblet hits a boulder, but instead of a heavy thud, I hear the sound of clay breaking.

_I trapped us here._

My throat burns and my vision blurs. The smoke in my lungs refuses to clear, no matter how hard I cough. I tip over onto my side, curling into myself. I barely notice Faust unwinding herself from my wrist. 

The landscape shifts wildly around me. The desert erupts into a lush meadow. Trees grow and wither in seconds. Lightning strikes, illuminating a swirling blizzard. I feel a warm hand on my ribs, and the blizzard settles into a lazy snowfall. 

“Shhh…you’re okay.” Asra moves his hand to my head, stroking my hair. “I’m here. You’re okay. Can you sit up for me?” 

Silently, I push myself up and away from the sand I was lying on. He gently takes my face in his hands, turning it toward his own. I know his worried eyes are searching my face, but I can’t seem to focus. Asra sighs and removes his hands from my face to wrap an arm around my waist. With my arm around his shoulder, he walks me back to the house and sits me on the bed. I’m numbly aware that he must be very practiced in this routine. 

When he kneels in front of the bed with a cup of hot tea, it feels depressingly familiar to both of us. “This is Ashwagandha. To help your nerves. Do you know who I am?”

“Asra…how could I forget you, my love?” I force my eyes to focus on his despite my exhaustion. I can feel the relief wash over him. “I would sooner forget the world.”

“I…I’m glad you remembered.” He closes his eyes and presses his forehead to mine.  
I drink the tea, and he falls asleep holding me. 

I spend the rest of the night awake, chasing memories. They are silk scarves in the wind: undulating hypnotically as they slip through my fingers. I catch a precious few and wrap myself in them, determined to hide them from the breeze.


	2. The Sublime Nature of Crashing Waves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I feel a blush rise to my cheeks as I pull my hand away. “How long have you been awake?”
> 
> “Not long.” He yawns. “I think it woke me up. It’s quite an…intense sensation.” 
> 
> I raise an eyebrow. “Intense how?”
> 
> “You know how.” He brings my hand to his cheek again. 
> 
> “Show me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the smut chapter.  
It's important to the plot if you squint a little.  
Gender Neutral Apprentice.  
AMAB Asra (or magically altered Asra, it's the Oasis, anything can happen)  
Vanilla is an underrated flavor.

When I find myself wondering why the sun hasn’t risen yet, it instantly appears in the sky. Asra stirs beside me. Is any of this real? Is _ Asra _ real? 

I study his face, peaceful in sleep. He’s just how I remember. Smooth terra cotta skin, long white eyelashes, full soft lips. I cup his cheek with my hand. He’s warm. He shifts in his sleep and mumbles something incoherent. Tentatively, I trace my fingertips over his collarbone and place my hand over his heart. The white seal on his chest glows, and I can feel his heart beat in time with mine.

With a noise somewhere between a whine and a groan, he throws his arm over me and pulls me to his chest. It’s so cute, I can’t help but giggle. He opens one eye at the sound. 

“Good morning,” He whispers to the top of my head. “were you lonely?”

“Lonely?” I pull away, confused. 

He takes my hand and places it on his chest, in the exact spot it was just a moment ago. “I felt you.”

I feel a blush rise to my cheeks as I pull my hand away. “How long have you been awake?”

“Not long.” He yawns. “I think it woke me up. It’s quite an…intense sensation.” 

I raise an eyebrow. “Intense how?”

“You know how.” He brings my hand to his cheek again. 

“Show me.” 

“Close your eyes.” He kisses the palm of my hand, then the inside of my wrist, slowly and reverently. I feel his hands guide me to lie on my back. Slow, teasing kisses trail up my arm and shoulder. The bed shifts and I can sense his knees on either side of me, straddling my hips. Asra leans over me and brushes his lips over the spot where my neck and shoulder meet, slipping his tongue out to lick over the same spot. I shiver when he blows cool air on my neck. 

He kisses my lips again, opening them with his own and slipping his tongue in my mouth. I graze my teeth over his bottom lip as I take it between my own. Asra lets out an almost imperceptible sigh. I gently run my nails down his bare back to feel him stretch and shiver over me. 

“Asra…you were going to show me an intense sensation?” my eyes still closed, I can only imagine his expression.

“I will. I just wanted an excuse to taste your skin again.”

He kisses me again on the lips, then down my neck. I feel a gentle nibble at my collarbone, and then he presses his cheek to my chest. “Are you ready?” Asra asks. I’m not sure if he’s looking for an answer from me, or himself.

I answer anyway. “Yes.”

He presses his lips to my chest, and I can feel his magic flow into me. It is not the calming stream I have come to expect from Asra’s magic, but the sublime nature of crashing waves. I take a breath, and even the air feels different. I feel a pleasant tingle on my skin as he covers every inch of my chest with slow kisses.

“Open your eyes when I give you the signal.” 

“Mmmm…what sig-Oh!” I gasp as I feel a jolt of pleasure travel from my chest down to my core. I open my eyes to Asra looking up at me, one nipple between his thumb and finger, the other in his teeth. The look in his eyes could put a trickster god to shame. 

When I finally tear my eyes away from his, I notice the swirls of purple mixing with a manic rainbow of colors. Not only did our auras mix, but they filled up the room. I feel secure and empowered, surrounded by our combined energies. I want more. I want to be closer. 

Another jolt of pleasure brings my focus away from our auras and onto Asra’s mess of white curls, now nestled between my legs. He hums with satisfaction when he catches my gaze. 

“Asra…I want you…” 

He raises an eyebrow as I feel a finger slide into me. My fingers and toes start to tingle as I feel him drag his finger in and out, then add another. The colors of our auras swirl together faster, matching pace with my panting breaths. My senses are heightened; I can feel every miniscule bump in his tongue, each ridge on his knuckles. Asra swirls his tongue around me and my back arches. 

I feel him remove his fingers and give me one last lick. He positions himself and enters me as he closes his eyes and tips his head back in languid ecstasy. To my suprise, I don’t just feel the pleasant stretch of him inside of me. I also feel the pressure of being squeezed, of being inside...myself?

I look down at where our bodies meet, then up to Asra’s face. His amethyst eyes are dark with lust and the color on his cheeks deepened to a rich rust shade. 

“You’re feeling what I feel. And I..ah...I’m feeling what you feel.” His voice is breathy and ragged already. He slowly drags his cock in and out of me, savoring each moment. He lowers himself over me and kisses me again. One of my hands is tangled in his hair. I’m lightly dragging my nails down his back with the other, enjoying the sensation on my own back. Our love is a feedback loop; every sensation is amplified and returned to be amplified again. 

_ I needed this. To feel connected with Asra again. To feel grounded. He was the only solid thing for miles in this vast nothingness, and I needed his skin to touch mine _ . 

Asra quickens his pace as our auras whip around the room, mussing his hair with their own summoned wind. His kisses are impatient, desperate. I slip my tongue into his mouth as he muffles his moans with my lips. I feel heat rising from within me, the warmth of our combined energies spreading throughout my body. Asra breaks away from the kiss and moans my name. Our auras shine white, blinding us as we come together. 

I feel his energy, his life, in every cell in my body. If he’s not real, neither am I.

When we both come down from our high, Asra rolls onto his back and I cuddle into him with my head on his chest. He closes his eyes and smiles, peaceful and content. 

“I told you it was intense.” he mumbles.

“ _ That _ was what you felt when I touched you this morning?” I scoff playfully.

“Mmhm.” I can’t see Asra’s face, but I’m certain he’s wearing his trademark smirk.

“I don’t believe you.”

“ _ That _ is what I feel every time you touch me, or look at me, or call my name from across the garden.” He curls a lock of hair behind my ear.

“Now I  _ definitely _ don’t believe you.” I chuckle.

“Oh? Will I have to show you again?”


End file.
